thewww: ritualaid Horse_ebooks   I used to experience the EVIL PRESENCE I used to feel my body turning hard like stone I used to have TERRIFYING monsters haunt me in the ““The refusal of modern ‘enlightenment’ to treat ‘possession’ as a hypothesis to be spoken of as even possible, in spite of the massive human tradition based on concrete human experience in its favor, has always seemed to me a curious example of the power of fashion in things ‘scientific.’ That the demon theory…will have its innings again is to my mind absolutely certain. One has to be ‘scientific’ indeed to be blind and ignorant enough to suspect no such possibility.” - William James “The Nuppeppō (ぬっぺっぽう?) (also known as Nuppefuhō) is a yōkai that is genderless and estimated to be up to 1.5m in height. It is described to have a flabby appearance and its appearance is accompanied by a pungent body odor. It appears as a blob of flesh with a hint of a face in the folds of fat. It is also described as having fingers and toes that are vaguely defined lumps.” Demons, and by that I mean imaginary constructions (like nightmares), are made of desire and fear, and they offer short term rewards for being satisfied. A few years ago I had a dream with a nightmare/demon much like this, a nuppeppo repeating back to me the negative projections I made on other’s bodies and the judgment calls I made on myself which held me back. The morning after this dream I became aware of the idea that body dysmorphic disorder could be understood as an accumulation of negatives in the unconscious which eventually takes on a nightmare and imaginary form. A year or so later, having forgotten the demon and the idea, I stumbled on an image of the Nuppeppo on tumblr.  Last August I went to the Utah wilderness to a rehab, a behavior modification camp, and while this sounds awful, it’s actually a great opportunity. I took with me a few different meditation styles and exercises, focusing mainly on the Sufi/Eckankar Hu chant and my heart chakra, primal scream therapy, and eye contact yoga. Towards the middle of the program, I received some books from my Mom, by Jungian psychoanalyst Robert Johnson - Owning Your Own Shadow, He, She, Inner Gold, and Inner Work. Inner Work suggests ‘inviting’ the disparate components of the unconscious to appear in the imagination in order to recognize and dialogue with them. (As it’s been a while since I went into this space, I forget the exact methods, although they are in a roughed up journal I’ll dig up later). Jung would’ve called these archetypes, and while my experience certainly had characters that conformed to his methods, I also encountered the Nuppeppo and a giant fly which might be compared to Ba’alzebul. It’s important to remember that the real, people’s actions often proceeds from the unconscious, from the imagination, and that while these figures might arise from delusions or incoherency, they’re not delusions. They are fragments. “These shards constitute evil and are the basis for the material world; their trapped sparks of light give them power. The first man, Adam, was intended to restore the divine sparks through mystical exercises, but his sin interfered.” When I encountered the Nuppeppo, eyes closed in a camp chair by my fire, it wasn’t particularly virulent, as my diet up to that time had been healthy. I bargained with it, a suggestion of Johnson’s for integration of these incoherencies in the psyche, to honor the needs of the soul - i.e. partier and work-a-holic. There was a time when I maintained an active connection to my imagination, and more light was shed on each of these uncooperative entities. Eventually upon my return to society, the Nuppeppo became part of my unconscious, compulsive eating which was more refined, certainly, not choosing terrible foods, but nonetheless a demonic act. One evening I read through my journal from the wilderness which contained the language of invocation and walked through the Los Angeles Valley. I walked into a donut shop with the “intent” to purchase a chocolate milk and a donut. A voice popped into my head “We already have a bargain.” “Who are you?” “I’m hunger, and you disrespected me, so I tried to kill you.” It seems in some ways, this demon was the warping of a drive into an addiction. When I went ahead and bought the donut and milk anyway, I asked about the consequences, “I’m going to make you near vomit when you smoke, make your stomach sick, the food will give you diarrhea.” This is a combination of both neuroticism and body consciousness that I feel deserves further exploration. I ate my donut and chocolate milk, and walked long enough that although Hunger’s words were fulfilled, I also didn’t feel ashamed. I’m keeping my demons under control these days, maybe even redeeming them. With Hara Zen and mindfulness, they don’t seem to manifest, and so this more ‘magical’ and imaginary route of programming seems outmoded. I’ll pursue more demonology when I leave my current living arrangement and feel more comfortable with the self-talk and other ‘weird’ behaviors which cause either concern or interest in what I don’t feel is an appropriate topic of inquiry or conversation for most.

thewww:

ritualaid

Horse_ebooks
 
I used to experience the EVIL PRESENCE I used to feel my body turning hard like stone I used to have TERRIFYING monsters haunt me in the
““The refusal of modern ‘enlightenment’ to treat ‘possession’ as a hypothesis to be spoken of as even possible, in spite of the massive human tradition based on concrete human experience in its favor, has always seemed to me a curious example of the power of fashion in things ‘scientific.’ That the demon theory…will have its innings again is to my mind absolutely certain. One has to be ‘scientific’ indeed to be blind and ignorant enough to suspect no such possibility.” - William James

“The Nuppeppō (ぬっぺっぽう?) (also known as Nuppefuhō) is a yōkai that is genderless and estimated to be up to 1.5m in height. It is described to have a flabby appearance and its appearance is accompanied by a pungent body odor. It appears as a blob of flesh with a hint of a face in the folds of fat. It is also described as having fingers and toes that are vaguely defined lumps.”

Demons, and by that I mean imaginary constructions (like nightmares), are made of desire and fear, and they offer short term rewards for being satisfied. A few years ago I had a dream with a nightmare/demon much like this, a nuppeppo repeating back to me the negative projections I made on other’s bodies and the judgment calls I made on myself which held me back. The morning after this dream I became aware of the idea that body dysmorphic disorder could be understood as an accumulation of negatives in the unconscious which eventually takes on a nightmare and imaginary form. A year or so later, having forgotten the demon and the idea, I stumbled on an image of the Nuppeppo on tumblr. 

Last August I went to the Utah wilderness to a rehab, a behavior modification camp, and while this sounds awful, it’s actually a great opportunity. I took with me a few different meditation styles and exercises, focusing mainly on the Sufi/Eckankar Hu chant and my heart chakra, primal scream therapy, and eye contact yoga. Towards the middle of the program, I received some books from my Mom, by Jungian psychoanalyst Robert Johnson - Owning Your Own Shadow, He, She, Inner Gold, and Inner Work. Inner Work suggests ‘inviting’ the disparate components of the unconscious to appear in the imagination in order to recognize and dialogue with them. (As it’s been a while since I went into this space, I forget the exact methods, although they are in a roughed up journal I’ll dig up later). Jung would’ve called these archetypes, and while my experience certainly had characters that conformed to his methods, I also encountered the Nuppeppo and a giant fly which might be compared to Ba’alzebul. It’s important to remember that the real, people’s actions often proceeds from the unconscious, from the imagination, and that while these figures might arise from delusions or incoherency, they’re not delusions. They are fragments.

“These shards constitute evil and are the basis for the material world; their trapped sparks of light give them power. The first man, Adam, was intended to restore the divine sparks through mystical exercises, but his sin interfered.”

When I encountered the Nuppeppo, eyes closed in a camp chair by my fire, it wasn’t particularly virulent, as my diet up to that time had been healthy. I bargained with it, a suggestion of Johnson’s for integration of these incoherencies in the psyche, to honor the needs of the soul - i.e. partier and work-a-holic. There was a time when I maintained an active connection to my imagination, and more light was shed on each of these uncooperative entities. Eventually upon my return to society, the Nuppeppo became part of my unconscious, compulsive eating which was more refined, certainly, not choosing terrible foods, but nonetheless a demonic act. One evening I read through my journal from the wilderness which contained the language of invocation and walked through the Los Angeles Valley. I walked into a donut shop with the “intent” to purchase a chocolate milk and a donut. A voice popped into my head “We already have a bargain.” “Who are you?” “I’m hunger, and you disrespected me, so I tried to kill you.” It seems in some ways, this demon was the warping of a drive into an addiction. When I went ahead and bought the donut and milk anyway, I asked about the consequences, “I’m going to make you near vomit when you smoke, make your stomach sick, the food will give you diarrhea.” This is a combination of both neuroticism and body consciousness that I feel deserves further exploration. I ate my donut and chocolate milk, and walked long enough that although Hunger’s words were fulfilled, I also didn’t feel ashamed. I’m keeping my demons under control these days, maybe even redeeming them. With Hara Zen and mindfulness, they don’t seem to manifest, and so this more ‘magical’ and imaginary route of programming seems outmoded. I’ll pursue more demonology when I leave my current living arrangement and feel more comfortable with the self-talk and other ‘weird’ behaviors which cause either concern or interest in what I don’t feel is an appropriate topic of inquiry or conversation for most.

(rhea137から)